So many of you know this story, and have actually seen me tell it with enthusiasm and physical examples, however I will try to put it into words...
Raul was returning from his month long rotation in New York and I was in Arizona anxiously awaiting his return. It had been over a month since we had seen eachother and I was going to bring him home from the airport with some style and class and a bit of sexiness.
I found this awesome dress, that buttoned down the front and tied like a trench coat, it was all black with white trim and was stylish and sultry. I had my super high heals on, my cute trench coat dress and absolutely nothing else. I was bare butt naked underneath ready to surprise my Ruly early in the morning at the airport.
It was still dark out when I left and there was a nice cool breeze which I could fully enjoy given I was stark naked under my dress. I felt super cute, my hair was lose and wavy, my makeup was on and I was on my way to surprise my husband. I strut my stuff down the walkways of the airport as I went to meet Raul at the baggage claim.
I saw him in a long line of people because their baggage had not come in with the plane. I was so excited to see him and walked quickly up to him, reached up and gave him a long tight hug. A lady tapped me on the shoulder and said meekly, "Um, maam." I didn't remember if she said anything else or just pointed, but I reached back and made an astounding discovery.
In all my excitment and drowsiness I never made a full 180 turn in the mirror when getting ready that morning. I reached back to feel my dress and realized there was a slit about 2 feet high revealing the entirety of my big white booty!!! (I had been tanning so it wasn't too white at least)
The dress was not a dress at all, it was actually a trench coat with cute trimming. My backside was 100% exposed and I had been strutting my stuff walking down the airport and hugging my husband in a line of over a dozen people behind us. The slit went up to about the small of my back and when I reached up to hug Raul it opened about that high as well. Everyone in that line had a great story to tell, but especially me.
The funniest part is I was not that embarrassed about the people seeing my butt, more that I had tried to be sexy and now had to tell Raul what had happened. He looked at me with a bit of disbelief. Luckily when I put on his jacket it completely covered me.
Unfortunately we had to stand in the line for about one more hour waiting to find Raul's bags. So I got to share that hour with a line of strangers who had now seen my butt as clearly as anyone ever could.
It's just the best story ever! I still have the trench coat, I have not worn it since.
3 comments:
Holy Freaking Heck!!!!!!!!!!! I think I would DIE if that happened to me!!!!!!!!!!! hahahahahah! That is soooooooo funny! ok, I bet if you send that in to Cosmo they will totally publish it in the tell all section!!!!!!! Oh man, I would totally die. Thanks for that Kelly!!!!!!!!!!!
You're a dork! Oh, also, PLEASE take "work verification" off you're comment options!!!!!!!!!
that is too hilarous. that was great. thanks for the good laugh. Ill let you know if I think of a really embarrassing monnet for me.
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